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Saturday, 18 June 2011


An incoherent bellow from the stairs and I find myself clawing to awake.  It’s not the destination I had planned on getting to for at least another few hours.  When the chill in the air hits my dry eyes, I realise I’ve set my jaw and it aches.

The plumber is here.  Well not here in the bed, here at the house, unannounced.  Oh forgive me, the incoherent bellow was the announcement… but really an earlier one, say the day before may have been helpful.

I have managed to bypass awake as a destination and scuttle right on through to completely and utterly shattered, the sister city of awake, otherwise known as zombie.  I shuffle to the lounge to watch TV through bleary eyes and the power cuts out.  So I freeze my way through five hours at zombie unable to travel to sleep because there is no power, no heat, no plumber, but now an electrician in the ensuite.

Then the electrician leaves, appliances unplugged everywhere, my bath disassembled and rubber gloves left in my bathroom.  Who knows?  And it’s too late; I have now missed sleep as a destination and am near the end of the line, at overtired, cranky and delirious.

Seems like the perfect time to interact online.  And now I have power nothing can stop me.  Except wind, gale force wind.  So there’s no internet.  My jaw is still set, my eyes still bleary and my brain uncooperative.

But there is success.  The internet is suddenly playing.  It only took five attempts of rebooting the computer and rebooting the modem, but it is something to be happy about.  My jaw tightens.  An email, from a Queensland Health worker who communicates in her native tongue of passive aggressive, which I am fluent in, but prefer not to practice as I find the rhythms of the language grating to the ear.

So it reads, hope this finds you well, a statement, no question mark – a lazy and obvious attempt at showing concern when you really don’t give a shit what the answer is, and then that she needs to see me. And I must see her next Tuesday at two specific times.  She is not available any other time.  And even though she knows I am very sick, I must see her even if for a short amount of time.  Well wind where are you now?

If my jaw was any tighter it would be welded shut…breathe, self control.   I bite back the urge to send a vitriolic response in her native tongue, and instead type out something in my native tongue - polite and firm, letting her know that it in fact doesn't find me well.  Nor skipping merrily in the garden (well not that part but it was tempting) and since I cannot guarantee myself a shower, I certainly cannot guarantee anybody else anything.  So as much as she may need things, unfortunately until I can deliver on my basic human needs, hers are not really my priority.

There’s the announcement: You have now arrived at your destination, Prickly.  Be sure to put on a coat, the local weather is chilly year round and please watch out for flying burs caught in the gale force wind.  They are painful.  Welcome to Prickly, please enjoy your stay.


  1. I thoroughly enjoyed reading Marzi, although prickly is not a place I would like to stay very long. I hope you don't either. xxxx

  2. Feels a little bit like I've bought a house and settled in, but hoping to offload soon to the next fool who wanders into this godforsaken town.


  3. sometimes your intelligent writing and my brainfog feel entirely incompatible and i struggle to find the meaning in the words...yet i still enjoy. i find part of a sentence that delights me (second half of the last sentence in the fourth paragraph from the end) particularly and i read over again a few times, entranced.

    then i almost scream at the 'hope this finds you well' and whole ridiculous scenario about the appointment.

    and the last paragraph takes me to MY destination - smiling again at the pure joy of watching someone use this language of ours so skillfully it makes my mind sing through the fog.


  4. This reads like SteamPunk M.E.:Fantastic !

  5. I love it! I just love your description of the Queensland Health worker who communicates in her native tongue of passive aggressive .. he he he :0 )

    Some are just crap.
    Mine was totally pathetic filled with soft gentle tones of i don't give a shit! She even brought in her supervisor on her last visit and before the Super Dooper even put her foot in my door - and without hearing my reply to her Hello ... she was telling me she had another client who needed assistance and that she needed to go. Unbelievable Disregard. That was my quality 35 seconds from Qld Health! I was not given any air space as she barged in and talked over and through me - Letting me know absolutely ' That she considered me a waste of her valuable time'

    Good to hear you saying it as it should be. Patients needs come first. Otherwise why employ them at all.

    Hope you get some good rest in tonight (((Amara)))

  6. always enjoy marzi. you take this reality and kick it up a notch with your colorful word play!

    hope this finds you well. arg!


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